Sunday Evenings are for Thinking

My morning started off with some scripture that exemplified my week prior:

" A man's steps are directed by the Lord, How then can anyone understand his own way?" Proverbs 20:24

It explains perfectly where I am at right now and I don't even think I am understanding it in the way that the writer means for it to be understood. I currently am a graduate, yet still a college student, straddling the threshold of college and real life without a concrete position in the earthly world we live in.  I am seeking the Lord's Direction over my life, but don't yet understand it. I am striving to grow in my walk with the Lord and stumbling upon earthly roadblocks.  Past wounds seem to be lingering and depressive tendencies reoccurring.  We often hear suffering for being a Christian preached on. Paul was in chains for his dedication to preaching the Gospel and even still continued to preach it in his jail cell and to the prison guards. Spurgeon quotes 'have you yet suffered to the point of sweating blood?'  Buster told us this morning that suffering for Christ leads to great reward, emboldens believers, focusses our attention, brings great assurance, and reminds us its only by the strength of Christ.  But what about suffering from within yourself? What about suffering caused by your own bad attitude or when you just don't feel like ___ (fill in the blank).  Ernest Smith brought a message tonight at Seacoast on how we should act when we are broken inside that convicted and encouraged me. We must hold ourselves to a higher standard!! Get out of your 'woe is me' mentality! I know when I am being subject to bouts of depression I am quick to jump to the 'victim' mentality. I have so much self-pity that I some how combine with self-loathing that I isolate myself so that others don't have to be subjected to it. But what are we called to do as believers? Ernest gave a suggestion that fit right into a high school motto my school lived by: Jesus Others Yourself (JOY).  In your brokenness serve someone else! God is sovereign! Do you believe that? Do you live like you believe it? Treat others better than yourself while you are suffering. woah.  How would that change you? I had a good friend tell me one time "make the most of your situation in this present suffering so that you can be in your best position for your next suffering". Makes sense huh? How you handle this present suffering is either going to prepare you for future sufferings or you're just going to continue struggle in the same way you already have.  Why not prepare? Why not keep the devil from getting a foothold?  Ernest's second point was "break the crazy cycle". I think I went 'crazy' on at least 3 people this week and have currently only apologized for one of my crazy outbursts (just realized that).  Breaking the "crazy cycle" means not repaying "evil with evil or insult with insult'. Do what is UNnatural. Natural is retaliating in a fight, natural for me is isolating and internalizing, natural for you might be gossiping or lashing out. Whatever it is, break the crazy cycle! Serve those who hurt you unconditionally.  Be the first to apologize in a fight. I also had a friend tell me that I should end every one of my sentences with "but God."    

personal example:  

 I am lost and confused what direction I am supposed to be going BUT GOD. But God determines my steps no matter the course I plan in my heart and I can TRUST in the promises of the Lord that He will guide me.

 What would happen if we all lived like this? What would happen if we were to hold one another accountable to this standard? I can only imagine the message would be clear. I think the message would be one that Buster preached this morning "in Christ alone". I am suffering but Christ knows ALL of my sufferings. I am lost but God is laying a path before my feet. I am lonely but Christ is in my midst!  How do you handle suffering? 

All of You is more than enough for all of me

At what point did I forget that Jesus is more than enough for me? Or maybe I was only singing the words but never learned the true meaning? 

"All of you, is more than enough for all of me

For every thirst and every need

You satisfy me with your Love

and all I have in You is more than enough."

If we are called to be cross-centered, to be anchored in the Word, how do we find a balance for our lives? We are relational beings! God Himself created us that way. Jesus became a man so that we could have a relationship with Him. God also blesses us with earthly relationships and fellowship. We lean on one another, we admonish one another in Love, we rebuke and hold one another accountable when the devil tries to get a foothold. BUT the ultimate relationships is to be with the one who created relationships! Who do you take your cares and concerns to? Who do you turn to first when you seek comfort? It is my hope and prayer that we would be people who turn first to God, that turn first to seek biblical Truth, and turn first to seek comfort in the Lord.  Cast your anxieties on the One who cares for you and the One who has endured all your sufferings. 

CELEBRATE RECOVERY!

Celebrate Recovery is a program that Seacoast Church offers on Friday nights for those who have been saved from addiction, abuse, and other sin in their lives. I was invited one Friday by my friend Dereck who was taking some of the guys from the half-way-house that he has moved into. He informed me of the type of service that it was and I (desperate for praise and worship and fellowship with the Lord) told him I didn't care, I just wanted to go to church.  So I went that Friday and have been back a few other times since then. What I have come to realize is this: sin is sin no matter what form it manifests itself. It operates on the same basic principles in all of our lives. I listened to the testimony of a recovered drug and alcohol abuser and was immediately drawn to her story. What she was attempting to do with drugs and alcohol in her adolescence and part of her adult life is the same thing I attempted to do with success in sports, dating the most popular guys, and attempting to win as many awards as I could. She was seeking attention and love.  She was empty and wanted to be filled. She was lost and wanted to be found. The only difference between she and I was the types of things we choose to fill our voids with. Pick your poison! We both 'earned wages only to put them in a purse with holes in it" (Haggai)  And don't we even still, after being saved, experiencing God's immense love, and knowing that He is the only One that can fill us, have "affairs of the heart" as John Eldredge puts it and attempt to use worldly things, relationships,  jobs, etc to satisfy us? The principle behind the sins I was hearing described and the sins I fight on a daily basis were and are the same.

There was, however, one obvious difference between the people I was surrounded with and myself: they seemed to have more zeal, more vigor, more excitement and I can only surmise that this is because of the appreciation they have from the lives that our Great God saved them from. They did not seem to have a 'pride issue', or struggle with any feelings of 'active righteousness' (thoughts of 'MY righteous deeds got me here, MY good decisions). No. They knew, only our God was mighty enough to save them from the nightmares of lives they were delivered from! I sometimes wonder, if there will ever be a time where God brings me to total humility. Will there ever be a time when I do not delight to hear MY name praised? I am overwhelmed with selfish ambition. My only answer for the time being is to run to the cross! 

Miss Independent? Miss self-sufficient?

"Miss Independent. Miss self-sufficient. Miss keep your distance...

No wonder there are so many wounded women in the world confused about who they are and who they should be! I know I was there. I was once one of the ones that was confused. Listening to the lyrics of Eminem and others, having no guidance as an adolescent girl, and pouring myself into the things that seemed to get me the most attention and win me the most love.  As a naive adolescent I bought the lie that I was supposed to be 'miss independent'.  I bought the lie that I was supposed to play the game to win the guy, to be self-sufficient, and to say 'don't worry I got it'. But what does the Bible say? What does the Christian community say? 

In Captivating John and Stasi Eldredge discus our innate desires to look to one another in relationships for validation-- a validation that is not going to be found nor is it reliable. 

"If he [or she] hasn't found that deep validation he [or she] needs from God, he's [she's] a sitting duck....... "That is why we spoke of Romance with him [God] first. It comes first. It must. It has to. Adam is a far too unreliable source-amen!"  

John and Stasi Eldredge

And what about this desire I am filled with to make it look like I've got it all together? Got wants our broken hearts- our vulnerabilities! 

"The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise. " Psalm 51:17 

"For this is what the high and lofty One says- he who lives forever, whose name is holy: "I live in a high and holy place, but also with him who is contrite and lowly in spirit, to revive the heart of the contrite." Isaiah 57:15

The Lord tells us over and over again of this Truth. "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit"  Think of the great women of the Bible. What are there characteristics? Ruth, Ester, Mary, Rahab, Tamar. They are courageous, their trust in the Lord is NOT subjective. They are quietly cunning, and are incredibly vulnerable. All of these women risked severe consequence by their people by going against their cultures to follow the prodding and commands of the Lord. Let us all, women, following the examples given us by these women, go against our own cultures, begin a deep Romance with our Lord, and give Him and only Him our broken hearts and vulnerabilities that He may heal us! 

Peru Afterthoughts

Hellloooo friends :) Just a few afterthoughts from my trip. If it doesn't make sense it's probably bc I haven't really slept yet (since friday night) but i hope you enjoy hearin bout my trip! 


Love peru but even more than that LOVED sharing the gospel in Spanish. It just felt right. Some of you may know this but I sort of got stuck being the translator for our team. (The 19 of us broke into 4 teams... they brought 3 translators... i was the 4th. awesome) Glory to God seriously because I struggled! 

This was the first mission trip I have been on in which I feel sure God's will was done. The boldness in which others shared the gospel, the fervor people had to serve, and the dedication I saw of others seeking out and using every opportunity to touch someone's life was an example and challenge for my life. No time was wasted.. no fear of what this group of people would think of us... just plain and simple laying out the gospel for them in an honest a Truthful manor. It was raw and real. My hope is that on some level I can maintain a dedication to the unsaved, and have my eyes opened to the opportunities I may pass up every day here in the States, simply because I'm consumed in my own life. God continued to teach me throughout this trip that I should be living to please Him and not man by the boldness in which we are called to spread His kingdom. (regardless of embarrassment or awkwardness) So am I living to please God? or am I living to please man? We were encouraged upon returning to the States to find an accountability partner-- someone to ask us at the end of the day or week "who have you shared the gospel with today/this week?" 

Secondly...Do we love one another as Christ loved us as John tells us? Jesus said what you do to the least of them you do to me! Remember the story of Zacchaeus.. 

Lastly.. placed on my heart even before this trip but also during is this: don't ever underestimate the power of God. You may leave someone feeling discouraged and that you accomplished nothing. You may think you didn't get through to them. You may be upset that YOU didn't do better.. but we are simply tools for the Gardner. We may not always see how God is working in someones life. 

Tried to keep in short... should have known it would be long. Miss all of yall and sorry to the charleston people that left and I didn't get t say bye too :( 

Hope to talk to most of you soon.. and hey! Don't be afraid to call me or anyone else out! Have you shared the gospel today? Romans 10: 9-10

Much Love--
Sarah

Athletes in Action.. A Testament to God's Work in our Team

FCA TESTIMONY

 

Philippians 1:6

“being confident in this, that He who began a good work in us will bring it to completion”

 

 

I’m going to take a few minutes to attempt to depict to you the good work God has done in my life and in the life of my team through basketball.  My freshman and sophomore year at the College were very similar.  I came into a team that had a variety of issues that prevented us from reaching our potential on and off the court. Personally, I came to college young in faith, and as one who compartmentalized my life. God was extremely important to me and I had tasted and seen His goodness, but he was just one part of my life, and not the Lord over ALL of my life. I saw basketball as simply a game, having nothing to do with the Lord. I had no confidence in my team, nor did I think the Lord cared to use our team for any reason.

 

Junior Year was a pivotal year both for our team and for me individually.  Before the beginning of our season the book of Haggai was laid on the heart of one of our coaches concerning our team. The central message revolved around Haggai 2:9

"The glory of this present house will be greater than the glory of the former house,' says the LORD Almighty."

 We believed it to be referring to the high level of success the program once had and that God was going to restore us to that level. We lost our first 6 games that season. Nonetheless, we had to believe He would be true to his word despite us losing. 

{5 Now this is what the LORD Almighty says: "Give careful thought to your ways. 6 You have planted much, but have harvested little. You eat, but never have enough. You drink, but never have your fill. You put on clothes, but are not warm. You earn wages, only to put them in a purse with holes in it." 7 This is what the LORD Almighty says: "Give careful thought to your ways.} Haggai 1:5-7

At this point God is turning the soil in my heart.  I become convicted that in fact we were not giving careful thought to our ways, but that if we did God would bless us. The words come alive to me and I believe beyond a shadow of a doubt that God is going to fulfill this scripture within our team.

 

After being picked to finish last in preseason polls, at the end of the regular season we were in to top half of the conference. During the tournament, we made our first semi-final appearance.

 

For the first time since being on the team I felt a since of pride in the direction our team had taken. I gained confidence in the Lord and had fellowship in teammates and coaches. I felt so blessed to be on a team where God was a priority.

 

 

Senior Year

This past senior season felt like a continuation of the one before it. We hit the ground running starting off with a 5-1 record losing only to nationally ranked Florida State by 13 points.  God was in control from the start and at the head of our team. We gained support from the community at games during the inaugural season in the Carolina First Arena. We were blessed with guest speakers at team devotions who inspired us. Each individual speaker had a part in supplying a specific message for the team, and it was evident that God had sent him or her at the RIGHT time with the RIGHT message. God grew in us individually and collectively, resulting in a common mentality. We gained confidence in what He was doing in our team and within ourselves.  This year in the tournament we defeated Davidson and long time rival and previously dominant UTC (at their place I might add!) , before falling to Western Carolina in a triple over time performance in the championship game.

 

Freshman Year 11-17

Senior Year 23-8